el condor pasa

ok so i had a little breakdown. im not saying things are perfect now but my wise little sister sent me a reassuring email replying to an even bigger anxiety attack than you were able to witness. she pointed out that even though i have been fortunate enough to have some traveling experience. this is my first time to travel solo. and i have a lot to learn. i naively entered this trip with no expectations of running into problems. i have never experienced homesickness before. but i have to live in the now. and there is nothing wrong with a good cry. i am back on my feet and ready to circumnavigate this globe. i have to be confident and put myself out there, even if i dont speak these spainards language.

if you can't tell. tonight was a better night. although i am turning in early because kelly rose and i are going to try to catch a 7am bus back to cadiz, so we can enjoy some paella (signature spanish seafood dish--i am eating this for you josie) and a visit the beach (that 007 was filmed on) before ship time of 6pm. they are very strict about the curfew. i dont know the specifics but it is some ridiculous calculation for every 15 min you are late (late counts as not being on the ship, even if you are in the line to get on the ship), you are given a timeout at the next port of call for 2 hrs.

the bar that we went to last night was on the riverside of sevilla. apparently the area isn't super safe but we were traveling in a very large group so we felt pretty secure. i dont tend to like traveling in large groups but it happens. we were definitely fitting the profile of loud obnoxious americans too. but anyway, kelly rose, bridget, christina, and i walk into a bar next to the american bar all of our fellow SASers chose to drink at, and stumbled on a creepy local bar. we decided to stick it out since the bar tender spoke pretty good english and the locals were up for conversing. i met this guy named carlos, and since neither of us knew more than 12 words of each others language i think we held a pretty good conversation (mostly 2 hours of charades and pointing at each other saying "te" and "me"). at one point in the convo he said "hepay" and pointed to me. i looked at him with one brow raised and repeated "hepay?" then carlos smiled real big, pointed again, raised his left hand, gave me the peace sign and said "hippie." we both cracked a smile, and then i knew he understood. the rest of the night was spent trying to explain semester at sea, our families, politics, and i think we spoke briefly on the topic of motorcycles.

we met a guy named miguel (he told us to call him mike) today at dinner. he was our bartender/waiter. he studied in jersey, and spoke perfect english. he was really silly because he didnt let on to this for a while, i think he was eaves dropping. he was joking around a lot with kelly rose giving her a hard time. after claiming spain was the best country in the whole world because of the food, the absense of an open-alcohol container rule and the smoking anything everywhere, he gave us a few tips on spain. he said that doggy bags were, contrary to belief, allowed and not looked down upon. he told us never to order a sandwhich or french fries. and then persuaded us to buy 45 euros worth of fried seafood, scrambled eggs and cod, and this amazing clam dish.

i am excited for morocco because i am hoping it won't be such a bar scene. i am tired of only entertaining the opposite sex, as they try to make advances. i want to meet locals without feeling there is an expectation at the end of the night.